Being the eldest daughter, I needed to yield and consider for my younger brothers and sisters.Even from the smallest things such as food or clothes was their priority.
So I thought that my mom always was on their side and loved them only.
On puberty, these thoughts increased and I started somehow feel emptiness and loneliness.
So I did everything what I could do to receive her concern and love.
Without hesitation, I did many wrong things, even dangerous things such as cutting myself.
By those deeds, just as I have wanted, I could receive her concern and love.
At last, sometime when I got married I realized how much I have been spending an immature life.
My mom confessed that she couldn't treat me nicely because she was suffering from depression.
In fact, because she loved me more than anyone one else, she cried and said that she hurt me. However, I didn't even care for mom’s pain and sadness.
Does the love between parents and children really need confirmation?
Though I didn't need to confirm, why did I put on effort to win her love?
Just like I did to my mom, I see myself wounding her and giving her pain.
After receiving Heavenly Mother, for a moment I would be joyful and give thanks, and whenever I was tested, I would grumble and complain.
I whined that I couldn't understand Her words and chafed, and Mother would hold my hardened hands and embrace me with her love.
My young daughter cannot get off the food and drink that is on her mouth, change herself with clean clothes or even change herself with new diapers.
I guess our appearance would be just like this.
Heavenly Mother wipes away the sins and faults that we cannot personally wipe away, creating us as the ornaments of the beautiful fine linen.
Now that I know Heavenly Mother calmly loves me, I won't doubt or go impatient trying to confirm Mother’s love.
Coming down to this earth for this immature child, washing away all of the sins and faults of Their children, God the Father and God the Mother opened the bright, heavenly way.
I give infinite thanks and eternal glory for Their great love and grace.
World Mission Society Church of God preach the Second coming Christ,
However, The Church of God believe in Savior who is testifed on Bible.
In fact, when the people visit the Church of God,
they realize their thought is just misunderstanding.
by following the teaching of God.
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